Those hazel eyes. A Short Story.

As we passed each other in the hall, he turned back and called my name. Those hazel eyes that captured my heart every time. There was intensity in the way we held eye contact. I felt a bead of sweat trickle down my spine. It didn't matter how much I tried to deny it. Every time I saw him, my heart skipped a beat. It had been two days since I saw him with another woman. It had shattered my world. I had been angry. Now, I was just sad and hurt.

"Yes?" I asked, attempting to at least appear composed.

"You look nice today. There's something different and it's good," he casually informed me.

He couldn't pinpoint exactly what was different but he was right. There was something different. There was so much different. But I think he was just talking about my hair cut not my broken heart. Still, it had taken him three days to say something about it. For some reason, his compliment made my day.

"Thanks," I replied. I did not know what else to say.

We exchanged smiles and he waved a goodbye. Things had been awkward for a while now. But like he said, something was different. And I thought about that something every day. That something used to be what we called "being love." But now, we couldn't mention the word "love" in each other's presence. Or maybe it was just me. Maybe it had been just me all along. I stopped and turned back to watch him walk away. I missed him so much that my heart ached. I was so lonely now.

Calvin and I had met at a bar. We didn't meet in that "hi gorgeous, let me buy you a drink" sort-of-way. Our meeting was much more memorable.

Calvin was out with some friends and they were celebrating one of his buddies' birthday. I was alone pretending to watch the football game when really, I was much more intrigued with the clientele. I was in grad school working on my anthropology degree and firmly believed that a bar was a good place to people watch. They drank and let down their guard. Was this situation indicative of who we really were without all of the conscious, sober, social restrictions? I took a sip of my snakebite (Guinness and Strongbow, of course) pondering the question. I heard some shuffling behind me and turned just in time to see two men toppling towards me. Their bodies hit the floor and somehow, a beer showered me from my neck downwards. I gasped and glared at the two men on the floor. One man scrambled off the floor and offered me paper napkins.

"I'm so sorry," he blurted. I couldn't even look at him. For some reason, I was embarrassed. I attempted a smile. "Well, I should be going anyway," I said. I got up and left.

The next time I saw him we were in a local supermarket. He recognized me and apologized again.

"I'm so sorry about that little accident. I guess sometimes we can get a little rowdy." He smiled.

All I saw were those hazel eyes and I was speechless.

"I guess I should introduce myself. I'm Calvin. You can call me Cal."

"Hi. My name is Rachel," I said as we shook hands.

He must have read my thoughts. "Would you like to have dinner with me sometime? I promise I won't spill anything on you."

With that smile, those eyes and the bit of humor, I was smitten.

"I'd love to. And I'll bring an extra shirt just in case," I joked.



Still, our fabulous beginning began to crumble within six months. Cal got a position as a professor at my university. It was a good job for him but our relationship suffered. We had considered moving in together. But now, he was concerned about the moral and ethical repercussions of our relationship. I would graduate soon and then there would be no problem. So I agreed with his idea. We were going to separate until we were no longer in a compromising situation. I was hopeful. I loved this man and he told me he loved me.

But, here we were existing in the same space but not speaking except for short conversations. I went home every night to dream about the warm sunny afternoon when he held me in his arms, kissed me gently and told me, "I could do this for a long time. Rachel, I love you." I looked into those hazel eyes and believed that maybe we had something more permanent. "I love you too, Cal." I awoke with the same thought each time. The longer time dragged on, the more I doubted that there was any possibility that we were getting back together. What had happened to us?