another moment.

I had another moment today where I felt physically ill from overwhelming emotions. I was reflecting upon the past. Past events, past frustrations, past pain. It was a little more intense than I expected.

I felt faint this time. I wanted to sleep. I felt like I was having a hot flash. I was just so angry over the past events all over again. I wanted the emotion to be fleeting. My eyes teared up. I wished that it had all ended differently. Then I was sad. Sad about all the hurt that pervaded. Sad that I lost a friend. Sad that someone I cared about had become so distant. Sad that I felt that I'd never be able to get it back. Sad that maybe that's how it's supposed to be.

So then, I did all that I knew to do. I slept. Tried sleeping it all away. Unfortunately, I awoke.